I find myself slowly losing my grip on time. I try to tighten my grip, try to hold onto the leaving memories while the grains of time are escaping through the clutches of my hand. I feel stuck in this spiral where everything around me is moving and I am falling down in this tornado. I am stoned in this nanosecond moment in the space of time that I can’t leg go of. This moment, I wish I knew its origin or its end but I know that it comes from a place of grief and ends in the place of jocundity. I know that someday I’ll reach there and eventually I can breathe. I can let go of this woebegone moment where I am static but everything around me is moving at a speed I can’t comprehend, where I am miserable but everything around me exudes exuberance to the point I feel drowned by it, where I am stuck but everything is singing merry songs of freedom that so loudly beats on my eardrums I can feel blood oozing out from my ears. It will be a place illuminated by divine positive energy and aurora lights. It will be a place where I can finally rest. But for now, I just have to remember all this. I just have to believe that it will happen.
Last modified: October 5, 2020
