Oftentimes, I notice those small acts of kindness, those petty acts of affection, those needless words of appreciation, and I feel grateful to the core to experience them and to witness them coming from you. I may not acknowledge them completely but just know that I notice everything; from those petty gestures that show your love to those words that come out in phrases when you are your vulnerable self.
I know you’re not direct, I know you’re not as expressive but I also know you have your own language to show me all that, a language of faith, trust and compassion. A language that finds its words into those small efforts you put in bettering yourself, in bettering us, in bettering our togetherness. While being an expressive woman, words matter to me a lot. I need to speak as well as listen in return. I need them to feel assured and comforted at times. But I also know, this is not the way you speak, you speak through your actions.
So when you acknowledged my this need, when you acknowledged your inability in this sphere, when you acknowledged that you’re ready to improve, that you are willing to work on this; I noticed the courage it must have taken for you to be able to do that. I notice your effort and it feels so surreal, so beautiful, as if I’m watching a movie that I don’t want to end.
The feeling right here, it’s so magical, I fear it’ll vanish if I say it out loud and that stops me from acknowledging all these small gestures, all these subtle acknowledgements, all those tiny actions that shout words of your care and your love.It fills me with gratitude to have you here, even after going through my mind that’s filthy and my heart that’s in shambles. I’m grateful for how you try to clean that filth without a word of complaint when I spill it all over again. I’m grateful for how you pick up the shovel to remove those rubbles of my broken heart and Mason it to brand new with the ingredients of love and support. I’m grateful for how you put up with a body that’s limp and that has been left broken after witnessing and surviving storms after storms. In grateful for you finding me out of nowhere. I’m grateful for you choosing me. I’m grateful for you.
Last modified: January 5, 2021
